About 10 years ago, I was arrested for firing a home made potato cannon.
My friend Aaron had come over one afternoon with the plans for a home built cannon which would shoot a potato a few hundred feet. We decided to build not one, but two guns using the plans. After all, we figured that this thing would be so cool that we would end up fighting over who got to keep it.
We set off for the local hardware store to purchase the ABS drain pipe, fittings, and gas grill ignitor needed. We assembled the two cannons quickly, and waited all afternoon for the cement to harden. That evening we felt we were ready for testing.
We started off simply shooting paper towels out of the guns, just to make sure that there were no leaks from the combustion chamber, and spent a fair amount of time trying various propellants. (For the record, starting fluid works much better than hairspray...)
Before long we had graduated to firing actual potatos. We were launching the flaming spuds straight up in the air, and laughing as they splattered on the street. Our friend Mike had joined us in the festivities, simply to watch. There was a gratifying "shhhhhhhthunk" sound generated each time a gun was fired.
For reasons he has never fully explained, Aaron launched a potato at a near horizontal angle, down the street we were standing on. The potato blazed gloriously down the street, and it crossed the intersection a half-block down going what seemed like Mach 9, just as a police car pulled into the intersection. It missed the front windshield by no more than 6 inches.
Lights now flashing, the police car wasted no time zipping up the half block to where we were. The officer jumps out of his car, and with a puzzled expression on his face asks "Ted?" While Officer Don Grothe was still standing there with a disbelieving look on his face, another police car comes around the corner and pulls up right behind the first car. Not missing a beat, Officer Eric Knutzen jumps out and with the same puzzled expression says "Oh no! Is that Ted?"
By this time I am walking over to Officer Grothe, who is sharing a look with officer Knutzen that I interpret to mean "Oh shit!". I said sheepishly "Hi guys. Sorry about that." Officer Grothe turns back to me and says "We've got a bit of a problem. Come over here and talk with me", then motioned me to follow him to the sidewalk. At that moment, another police car comes around the corner, lights and siren wailing. Officer Grothe said "THATs the problem." Officer Knutzen had grabbed Aaron, and had taken him over to the sidewalk to talk as the third officer jumped out of his car, grabbed Mike, and started frisking him for non-existent weapons.
Officer Grothe points that out and informs me that while this other officer was new to the department, he was a 15 year veteran of a rural sheriff's department & anxious to prove his worth to the supervisors in his new department.
"After my car was almost hit with that potato & I saw the three of you standing here, I called for backup because I didn't know what I was up against. Eric was coming to back me up when that other guy radioed in that he was close and would come as well."
I knew Officers Grothe and Knutzen fairly well because at the time, Aaron and I worked as security officers at a local department store. During the course of catching shoplifters, going to court, etc. we got to know a large number of officers pretty well. I had been on 'ride alongs' with Officer Grothe, and I had spent an entire day with officer Knutzen at a trial just a couple of weeks earlier, where we had been 'excluded' from the court proceedings - which meant we had to sit in the hall so we couldn't hear the testimony of other witnesses.
Officer Grothe was at this point almost talking to himself. He was saying "If it was anybody else, I wouldn't think twice about charging them... but I'm not going to charge these guys... how am I going to get away with not citing them while HE's here... but these guys are my freinds... but if it was anybody else..." I interrupted this internal argument by saying "Don, I don't want to get you in trouble. We screwed up, and we'll just have to take the consequences. Cite us like you would someone else. I won't hold it against you."
So, Officer Grothe wrote Aaron and I both citations for "discharge of a BB gun, slingshot, or other flipper device within city limits", which is a violation of city code.
A few weeks later, we appeared in court for our arraignment. City Prosecutor Steve Schreiner noticed me, and came over saying "Hey Ted, I didn't know that we had any of your cases on the docket today..." I said "Look at your arraignment schedule, Steve."
His mouth dropped open. After explaining what had happened, Prosecutor Schreiner offered Aaron and I a plea deal. In exchange for a guilty plea, the class B misdemeanor we had been charged with would be dropped to 'disorderly conduct', an infraction. (An infraction is the lowest level of criminal offense in Utah, on par with Jaywalking.)
As the arraignment proceeded, Aaron was called up first because his last name is first alphabetically, but Prosecutor Schreiner asked the judge if he could hear both cases together, then motioned for me to come up to the podium.
Prosecutor Schreiner explained the plea agreement to Judge Stott. (Judge Stott presided over the shoplifting trial I mentioned before, and I'm sure that he recognized me.) Judge Stott then asked Aaron and I if we agreed to the plea deal. After we both said "yes", Judge Stott then asked me HOW we built the cannons. After explaining the technical details, Judge Stott asked "Why would you do such a thing?" I said sheepishly "To see if we could, your honor." Judge Stott chuckled, then ordered that our pleas were to be held in abeyance. If we did not have any further criminal charges within three months, the charges would be dismissed.
Aaron and I each had to write lengthy letters to the Peace Officer Standards and Training Council explaining these arrests before either of us was allowed into the Police Academy, not too long after this incident.
Post Script: Telling this story makes me just a little bit sad now, as Don Grothe passed away after an accident while fishing on August 24th, 2005. RIP Don
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